Dying is an inevitable facet of life, a natural progression that touches us all. This journey towards the end of life can unfold in diverse ways—peaceful and graceful or turbulent and fraught with stress. Amid this journey, there exists a phase known as the "rally." It occurs just before the final moments of a person's life. This rally phase often shrouds itself in misunderstanding and misconceptions. It's imperative to unravel what it truly signifies.
The dying process involves physical and emotional changes as the body shuts down. As the heart weakens, circulation slows, leading to cold hands and feet, pale skin, and drowsiness. Breathing becomes irregular and shallow. The patient may experience delirium or visions. Providing comfort through pain management, emotional support, and spiritual care is crucial.
When I first started working in the field of hospice, my clinical manager told me (I’m paraphrasing), one day you will be able to walk into the room, and without getting a single vital sign, just by visual observation, be able to tell that the person is dying or will be shortly dying. That was about three years ago. Today, it’s almost chilling for me (as it is both a blessing and tremendous responsibility) to be able to share she told the truth, and that over time — if you give yourself patience and grace and take the time to listen, observe, and remember — you too will learn how to tell when someone is close to or otherwise is dying.
Please allow me to share some of my insight as to how I know a person has less than a month left to live, and often far less. First off, let’s go into the important discussion you should have with the family, friends, and the patient themselves that provides an overall background to the prognosis. That discussion should be centered around what types of decline (downward, negative) changes have been taking place in the patient’s life over the last six months making note as to whether the decline is minor, medium, or major and the frequency (once a month, once a week, etc.) of those changes.